The Power of Brevity - "Hot In Here"

Less is more

The concept of brevity goes beyond not repeating things, or avoiding the sin of over explaining something, or going on and on, hoping your reader will finally understand what the heck you're talking about. Brevity asks you to focus on word choice and the imagery those choices create.

A simple example to set the stage -- in "A Wanted Man" by Lee Child, Jack Reacher is given a bottle of water. Child then explains:

"...He split the seal on the bottle..."

Child could have said, "...He opened the bottle..." (yawn!) but by choosing the verb "split" and the noun "seal," he produces an image that's impossible to miss. In fact, he accomplished a few things. He shows the action and puts the reader tight into the narrator's POV by allowing the reader to actually hear the action.

My freelance editor, JJ, put me to task. Over the last few months I've been knee-deep in revisions and have taken this simple lesson to heart. The right verbs go beyond showing, they let the reader hear and experience it by pulling them in closer to the story.

It was with this in mind that the opening lyrics of a Rascal Flatts song caught my attention.

"Hot In Here" by Rascal Flatts
She jumped in my truck in her bare feet
Slid on over to the middle seat
Baby crack a window,
Crank that AC high as it can go

Let's dig in...

She jumped in my truck in her bare feet

The opening sentence should make the reader/listener ask questions and extrapolate answers. Who is she? Why is she in her bare feet? She can't be a high society woman. Poor? Or is she a young woman? He drives a truck. Small town in rural America? Maybe Let's hear more.

Slid on over to the middle seat

Beautiful use of an audible verb. Slid creates the picture we need. She must be younger -- youthful attitude to be in bare feet and slide on over. As close as she can be to him.

Baby crack a window,

She calls him "baby." Not just acquaintances. Young love? Can you hear the crack of the window? Are you in the driver's seat yet? I remember my first car and how the day's temperature expanded the windows such that the first time I rolled her down, a cracking sound would echo in my poorly insulated car.


Crank that AC high as it can go

Crank. Old truck, no touch-screens on this puppy. It must be hot outside. And it seems that when these two are together, things get hot inside. Now the image of a barefooted young woman is taking on a new meaning.

What the songwriter(s) have done is set up the world and situation. The judicious use of powerful verbs create images, produce sounds, and deliver the audience an experiential story. We can see ourselves there, we've probably lived a version of this story in one form or another.

Brevity is power. As writers, we must question if our readers can experience the sentence we've written.

Are there passages or song lyrics that with the brief use of words have created a complete scene for you? Scenes where you didn't need to be there, but you could see it all unfold in front of you?

Fight the good fight!

Fail Gloriously!

My eight-year-old wanted a skateboard for Christmas.

I wasn't crazy about it. My wife wasn't crazy about it. Yet, Santa apparently chose to fulfill his wish.

Needless to say, he was giddy with excitement. And in his excitement we were happy. My wife even went on YouTube with him and found how-to videos by the man, Tony Hawk. All was good.

For a few days, all he did was practice on that thing. During the day, in the yard. At nights, in the house. I cringed when I saw the scratches on our hard-wood floor, but turned a blind eye.

One night, while I wrote, I heard a thud from downstairs. "You okay?"

"Um, yeah."

I went back to my work. Ten minutes later, another noise. "What happened?"

"Nothing. I'm practicing."

I knew better than to just walk away, but I did. Five minutes later--you guessed it--a louder bang.

I inspected the war area... I would have been justified to get mad, take away the skateboard and tell my wife I told you so. But I didn't.

I can replace plaster and paint. I can't take away words that will forever tell him that failure is bad.

You see, I'd been breaking my own "plaster" upstairs. I'd been struggling with my writing. Trying and failing. Trying and failing.

There is nothing wrong in failing. Implied within failure is that you gave it a shot, you tried. And more importantly, you tried again.

If you're hitting walls, don't give up. Don't talk yourself out of it. There are plenty of people in your life (including the little voice in your head) who will convince you that you're not good enough, smart enough, creative enough.

Fail. Fail gloriously.

Some of us will understand and applaud you for trying. And do me a favor--once in a while, remind me that It's okay for me to get it wrong too.

I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.

~ Michael Jordan

Fight the good fight!

The Risk With Revisions

Since September, I've been engaged in this wonderful thing called revisions.

No, I'm not a sadist (or is it masochist? which one likes to be punished? I forget). I really do enjoy spending time with my characters in my story world.

But there are risks with revisions.

If you're like me, when you finished your first "this is it!" draft, you got your manuscript out to a handful of beta readers. They probably picked up a few (a thousand or so) mistakes.

If you happen to have a couple of extra bucks (or euros, or Thai Baht, or whatever you use) you might have even hired a proof reader who found every single stray comma, adverb, or you-name-the-offense that reared its ugly head in your manuscript.

But then something else happened... you discovered that you had holes. Or you could do some scenes better. Instead of telling the reader "He was pissed," you showed, "He pulled off his belt and bit into the leather, yelling until tears burnt his cheeks."

This is the area of risk.

The moment you make updates to the story, whether a line, a paragraph or a whole new chapter, you have introduced the possibility of silly errors. We are human after all, are we not?

What's my solution to this? No, I do not want to bother my eagle-eye readers, or pay a few hundred drakma to an editor again (apparently, my children have expectations of being fed).

Read Out Loud

When you are done, reread that chapter out loud. It may seem odd at first, but this is the most effective tool a self-editor must use. In fact, reading out loud is a critical piece of my revision process. I read the entire manuscript out loud and as I read, I find mistakes, and more importantly, lines that don't sound right.

Let Technology Work For you

Although you should (must) read out loud, you will not catch everything.

Sometimes, your eyes overlook the obvious. Example:

• breath or breathe
• through or though
• lighting or lightening

We've all seen it happen. That one little letter gets passed us, just to embarrass us. After all, you've written the darn thing, and if you're like me, you know those lines so well that you can almost recite it without reading each word. Unfortunately, I am not able to turn off my automatic read-ahead mind. I'm not that disciplined.

As I've said before, I use (and love) Scrivener.

[Soap Box: If you don't use Scrivener, I don't understand. At $45, it is the single most powerful tool you will ever use as a writer. Visit my friend Gwen Hernandez's site to learn how to use it. Even better, sign up for her class.]

When I'm done editing, I highlight the paragraph in question, right-click and choose "Speech" --> "Start Talking."

(Note, you can do this in MS Word also, but I'd rather pretend that everyone uses Scrivener)

On the Mac, the voice of the reader is fairly decent. The beauty is that you hear the mistakes immediately. As I listen to the narrator, all I do is highlight words, or sections that sound odd. I don't edit right then and there. I don't want to miss other mistakes that the narrator may pick up.

In Scrivener (or Word) highlighting is fast. So you won't miss more than a micro second at best.

Or you can do this with hard copy of your manuscript at hand. Listen and follow along on the printed document. When something catches your ear, highlight it.

When you hit the end of the chapter. Correct the mistakes. But wait, you're not done. Listen to the corrected section one more time. Yes! Do it. Be picky. This is your work. Listen again. Make sure you didn't just introduce another mistake.

I use the computer narrator all the time. It's a powerful feature. And although listening to the whole book is time-intensive, it is invaluable. The things you hear, will surprise you. Also, the experience of hearing your story read back to you is fresh and powerful.

I highly recommend it. Give it a shot.

Do you have any special tricks? If you try this technique, let me know if it works for you.

Fight the good fight!

Business Travel Doesn't Alway Suck

Actually, that's not true. I change my mind. Business travel does suck.

But sometimes... just sometimes... something unexpected makes it all worthwhile.

My Tweeps (Tweeps = Tweeter Peeps (Peeps = My Peoples (Peoples = you know... people... a lot of 'em))) got a handful of tweets from me when I was on my latest trip in San Diego.

I shared a picture of the marina from my room... If you haven't been to San Diego, find an excuse. It's one of those places that gets a hold of you and does not let go.

The trip itself was good. Conferences, coffee, workshops, coffee, one-on-ones with experts, coffee, meet new people, coffee, strategy sessions, and... let's see... did I mention coffee?

From 7 AM until approximately 6:30 PM I was busy with this stuff. And typically, my brain is fried when I go to these things. So much information, limited capacity left in my brain, and that typically results in no more juice left to be creative.

This time, it was a bit different.

Maybe it was the weather.

Maybe it was this statue that just spoke to me.

Maybe it was the coffee.

Or maybe it was the fact that I was still on a high from the James Scott Bell seminar that kickstarted the revisions of Rocky Peak.

Whatever it was, I had a phenomenal three nights of writing. From Sunday evening (when I arrived) to Wednesday afternoon (when I left), I had accomplished two things:

(1) I had added all the new scenes that I had identified ~ 12k words in 3 days
(2) I had completed the manuscript

And boy am I proud of how things have come together with this story. I am now doing a final read-through before I send off a copy to my mentor Michael Levin and my wife.

So I thought I'd share a couple of additional pictures. My "Hotel Room Office" and the elements that I use to get things done.

This is what's on my desk.

And when I look over my right shoulder, this is what I see.

It may be hard to figure out, but what I have on my window is a bunch of stickies.

Throughout the day, I jot down ideas.

It may be a new scene...

An inconsistency...

A good line...

A question...

or a reminder to further peel the onion layers of the plot challenges...

These are the things that bring everything together. The little accents that make the pieces flow with texture.

When I was revising, as I addressed a sticky, I would move it off of my "To Do Window" and set it aside in my "Done" pile. This is a very effective method that I've used for more than just writing. It comes from a project management methodology called SCRUM. Maybe I'll tell you guys about this rapid and agile process for getting things done in a future post.

Finally, Here's a blow up of my desk with some explanation

Research Material: 

• My iPad with all the Evernote research in front of me.
• My Revision plan -- A few sheets that includes the plot summary

The Avatar:

• That's my now infamous Moleskin notebook and pen that are my avatar on Tweeter

Music:

• Self-explanatory. In this case, I was listening to Evanescence

The JSB Flashcards:

• Read my post on James Scott Bell's seminar and some of the amazing tools I learned to use

Scrivener in Action:

• Read my post on why I love Scrivener so much here and here

Coffee:

• Really? You need me to explain this?

Fight the good fight!

Tools for Brainstorming - Part III

It seems that everything needs to be a trilogy. Why not my tools for brainstorming? The wait is over. The final installment is here...

Method III - The Mind Map

Let's start with Wikipedia:

"A mind map is a diagram used to represent words, ideas, tasks, or other items linked to and arranged around a central key word or idea. Mind maps are used to generate, visualize, structure, and classify ideas, and as an aid to studying and organizing information, solving problems, making decisions, and writing."

Well, if Wikipedia says so, then it must be true. And it is. I've used mind maps for years and I have to say that it has become my tool of choice for generating ideas, brainstorming, thinking out processes, and improving comprehension & recollection.

Let's talk about ideas. I start with the premise that you already have great ideas. Don't argue with me. I believe in you. We are stuck and struggling for ideas not because we don't have the capacity to generate ideas. The ideas are trapped in your head. Trapped. All your day's challenges and work have a dampening effect on your creativity. You are too busy thinking about work, or that term paper, or paying that bill, remembering to call mom, you name it. I say that "We" are creative creatures by design.

Furthermore, I argue that we are less than six degrees of separation from problem to solution. My experience is closer to three. Said differently, the path from your starting point (the challenge/question) to the brilliant idea/breakthrough can be solved in less than six hops.

So what we need is a mechanism to help us extract these ideas. Let me stress this. You need to believe that your mind is infinitely more powerful than you give it credit. I never enter any situation believing that a solution may not be in reach. So please, please, please, do not be a defeatist. Believe in yourself and amazing things will happen

"Things are only impossible until they are not" ~Patrick Stewart as Cpt. Jean-Luc Picard in Start Trek the Next Generation

How do I do this mind map thingy?

The mind map starts with the central node -- the central idea. Think of it as the central question, or problem you're trying to solve. For example, let's say you are Ara eighteen months ago and really wanted to write. You are committed to this path. You stand on your desk and yell, "No more excuses!" Except that you have an excuse -- and it's a nasty one -- time. I have a demanding job. I travel. I have a wife and two boys and two cats, and, and, and.

So you start at the center node: I need more time to write

Now draw a branch from there and brainstorm options. Don't judge them -- not yet. There are no judgements when you brain storm. Get yourself out of the way. Be objective and belive that a solution is somewhere out there. Maybe early in the morning? write it down. Then draw another branch form the central node. How about during work? write it. Next, what about at nights? What if I quit my job? These are all options.

As you write these branches, you may find that your mind immediately generates an association and wants to develop that option. Let your mind roam here. Don't stop inspiration.

In my case when I wrote "At Nights" I drew a node and wrote "When?" Which then led to three new nodes: a) When I get home from work, b) after dinner, c)After the kids are asleep

I can not stress the power of writing it down. Succinct, crisp phrases. Many will add drawings as they do this. Do whatever feels write. But commit it to paper.

The brain opens up secret doors when you commit things to paper. But I don't have to tell you this, do I? Have you noticed how a story unfolds when you actually write it?

Ara, are there tools for this?

There are a lot of great tools out there. And I've used them all. Here are some:

Click to enlarge image

Pen & Paper


Nothing more powerful than being able to get a piece of paper and solve a major problem while waiting for a venti iced caramel machiato with an extra shot and some cinnamon powder.

Here I've shown a simple example. The issue is the same as above "How do I make time to write?" In fact this is a recreation of the real mind map I created nearly 18 months ago. In the real one I have some things that are "Personal" so I recreated it here for you.

You can see that I am thinking up of anything and everything.

iThoughtsHD for the Apple iPad

Say what you will about the iPad. It is a mobile tool that has phenomenal apps for almost anything.

Here's a screen print of this fantastic tool.

When I bought it, it was $5. Now it's $10. And worth every penny. In fact. Pay them extra.

Here I show you a bogus scene in a story. The point here is that I am able to quickly create a mind map, then add comments and images to my thoughts: Thumbs up, thumbs down, etc. I can even create links to show potential associations.

Novamind


There are other tools like Novamind, which I also use. It's a great application. You can do amazing things with it. Very intuitive but also a few hundred dollars depending on which version you get. In fact, with the iPad and iThoughts HD, I don't see a need for any other tool.

Below is a screen print of a complex mind map I created for fleshing out ideas. One of my reference books is "James Scott Bell's Plot & Structure. JSB explains the LOCK framework (Lead - Objective - Challenge - Knockout Ending). I created a template in Novamind so that I think of these items as I develop the concept.

A final word on the concept of "solution." Sometimes the solution is a painful one. It does not change the fact that it is a solution. In my case, in order to write I had to give up the concept of seven hours of sleep. So when I say that I believe we can find a solution to anything, there is a caveat that says, if it matters to you, you will be more excited over doing what you love and not be too concerned over what you have to give up.

BONUS MATERIAL:

And for sticking with me, I share this video by Stephen Pierce. This video shows you a very simple method in using Mind Mapping to accelerate comprehension when reading. I guarantee that with minimal effort you will be able to retain information better than ever before.

The key is that when you read something or you attend a conference, you need to have a goal, or a purpose for what you hope to learn. Get that etched in, then start mind mapping while listening. I guarantee better comprehension and recollection.

I use mind mapping when I read an article of interest. When I go to conferences and I want to get the core message with all the rest set aside.

I shared my mind map for JSB's LOCK framework. You guessed it. I created that when I first read the book. I wanted to make sure I understood and internalized it.

Fight the good fight.

Tools for Brainstorming - Part II (redux)

[Because of the Great Blogger debacle of 2011, I lost my original Part II post along with the comments. So Here is my attempt at recreating the genius I had committed to pixels - Editor]

 
I've decided to break this segment out into three parts. Why? Because this is my blog, and I can do whatever I want. How you like them apples?

Too heavy handed? Okay fine. How's this: I have so much information, such an avalanche of insight to share, that the only appropriate move is to give each technique their due time.

Or, something like that...

Method II - Sit on the Couch

This method came to me after I read the great James Scott Bell's "The Art of War for Writers." In it, he describes the Voice Journal, which is a great way "get to know" your character. You write in first person, and lay out the character's attitude, way of talking, answering questions that pop up. This is a steam of consciousness type of journaling.

I've used this method often, but I have a bit of a spin on it for the purpose of breaking through when I hit a rough patch.

When I'm revising, I will sometimes hit a spot that just doesn't feel right. Why did my main character (MC) do that? Why would he say that? Does it sound believable? Hundreds of questions come to me.

Think of yourself as the psychologist with a finely tuned truth detector that in the course of a conversation can pick up plausibility, believability and reasonability. You, the therapist, are asking the MC questions. You want to see why he did what he did? What was his "motivation" for acting that way, behaving that way, and saying the things he said.

As a consumer of entertainment -- be it books, TV, or movies -- I don't like it when others insult my intelligence. Picture this scene:

The Hero and Heroine love each other. But they have not expressed their true feelings, yet. The Heroine misunderstands the situation. The Hero should explain and resolve the misunderstanding. Simple. Just say it. JUST SAY IT. But he doesn't. The result is that they break up. Then that silly misunderstanding spirals into more challenges. And approximately 150 pages or so later, they realize they made a mistake. Sorry saps! 

Are you kidding me? If you've watched Telenovelas (Spanish/Mexican soap operas) you see this all.the.stinkin'.time. Please! What do you take me for?!

What? Oh, do I watch telenovelas? Em... well, you see... sometimes... umm, it's my wife, not me. It's her, I tell you!

Back to the couch. I imagine the MC trying to justify his decisions. It needs to make sense to me. I don't want to insult the reader. I don't my MC to insult me either. I need to make it plausible and realistic. In other words, would real people behave that way? As my reader you need to stay on my roller coaster, otherwise I risk losing you.

So when I find a scene that doesn't seem right, I sit my character on the couch and ask questions. I write fast and furious. In first person, with all the attitude that is appropriate for the character. He may even reveal things that are part of his unwritten back story. In other words, he tells me "why" his experiences and perceptions of the world have caused him to behave the way he has.

In practice, I usually find that my main character can not justify the questionable behavior but in this stream-of-consciousness writing, my character reveals new things that I can layer into the scene.

I find that my characters, when given the opportunity to tell me who they really are, I find a goldmine of information. I find more material than I could have imagined.

To those of you who write in earnest: has it happened that as you write a scene, your character does something completely unexpected? You pause and think about this behavior. You consider changing it. You tell your character, "That's not what I wanted you to do!" But if you're wise, you honor your character and let him show you what's really happening.

Sometimes the best way to have a breakthrough is by getting out of the way. Your job is to tell your character's story. Not your interpretation of the story.

So far we've discussed how to get focused (Part I) and how to let your characters speak up (Part II). In Part III, I will introduce a great tools -- the mind map.

Fight the good fight!

Say that to me again!

I'd like to believe that I'm a smart guy. In fact, I pride myself on my ability to listen fully. Also, I'm not defensive on most things (most) and fairly open-minded to the possibility of anything.

So far, this has translated well with my writing. Every feedback that I've gotten I've been able to find a way to make my work better.

Maybe not so true with my second novel. I've been revising Rocky Peak for a few weeks now. My mentor, Michael Levin, gave me fantastic feedback (as usual) but he wanted me to push the conflict and the problem further. Make it bigger.

So I did. After I shared it with him, we had what I thought was a repeat conversation.
"Good, very good. But we've seen that before. Escalate it, bring something new to the reader."

Hmm... okay. So I  brainstormed some more and come up with the ground breaking idea. Send it off.

And again... "Yes. I get it. But, we've seen that in x book, and y movie. It needs to be fresh. Escalate it."

It didn't quite sink in until I watched Nacho Libre. Nacho Libre???? Yes, my friend, there's a lot of wisdom that comes from the lips of Jack Black. The specific scene is the one where his "Luchador" partner (Esqueleto) tells Nacho, that he hates all the orphans.

I Hate Orphans!
Nacho Libre at MOVIECLIPS.com

The reality was that I didn't want to hear what I was being told. I wasn't ready -- emotionally -- to take my characters there. Because I knew what it would imply -- There would be hurt, pain, and possibly loss. I didn't want to do that to them. I am too attached to them. I care for them. But isn't that when it really hurts in life? We suffer over people we know, scenarios that we can relate to, pain that we've experienced in the past. We may not want to open those wounds. We may not want to relive them, but if we don't, are we being honest. Are we really writing what is in our heart?

Last night was tough. When reality stares at you, do you look away, or face it with courage?

I outlined my thoughts and got ready to kill my darlings. By just past midnight, I had what I thought was powerful -- and painful. I haven't made the revisions yet, as I'm waiting for feedback. But when I do, I will drop head first into a roller coaster ride. And that's good. I should go through that, because if it hurts me, then I will give my reader something that will be meaningful.

I must do right by my reader. And the reader is who really counts... after all, I'm one of them.

Fight the good fight.

As seen on Twitter: Writing Prompts by Donald Maass - Consolidated

[Updated on April 27th, 2011 - Added April's writing prompts]

If you are a writer, this blog post is for you.

A month ago, literary agent and author, Donald Maass (@DonMaass) started posting writing prompts on Twitter. For those in the business, Donald Maass is a house-hold name.

He is not only the founder of one of the premiere literary agencies but also the author of a various books to help transform your next novel, into a breakout novel. Recently, the paperback version of his latest book, "The Breakout Novelist" was released.

Also, you know that I am a huge fan of James Scott Bell. Connection? Mr. Maass represents Mr. Bell. Nuff' said!

I got a lot of value out of these prompts and used them as my night-time "Do This" exercise. I'm editing my second novel while I query ACES. These helped me go back and revisit scenes, motivations, and more.

I understand that he plans on doing more of these and will also post them on his agency's site. Until then, I've compiled them. I wanted to have these all in one place, and said to myself, "Self, I bet your peeps would like these also."

If you like these, you'll love his books.

Without further ado, here are all of his promts, as seen on Twitter:

01 What’s the worst thing your MC does? Whom and how does that hurt? Now work backwards, set it up to hurt even more. #Maass

02 What’s the most selfless thing your MC does? What good change or effect does that have on someone unexpected? Add that in. #Maass

03 Find any violence in your ms. Delete any shock, fear or horror. Replace with two *conflicting* emotions that are less obvious.#Maass

Today's Breakout prompt may be tougher than it looks. Let me know. Ready? Here we go...

04 Choose a middle scene: What does POV character feel most strongly? Evoke that feeling without naming it, through actions alone. #Maass

A tragedy really puts things in perspective, yes? Help others, live strong, write. Today's Breakout prompt for whenever you're ready...

05 What should your readers most see, understand or be angry about? At what story moment will that happen? Heighten it in two ways. #Maass

We grow and change day by day. Characters can too, scene by scene. Today's Breakout prompt coming up...

06 How does your POV character change in your current scene? Work backwards. Make that change unlikely, a surprise or impossible. #Maass

It's Sunday, but no rest for fiction writers! Today's Breakout prompt coming up in just a minute...

07 What does a sidekick or secondary character see about your MC that your MC denies? Force a showdown over it. #Maass

Our friends sometimes know us better than we know ourselves. Today's Breakout prompt coming up...

08 What does a sidekick character know about your MC that your MC refuses to see? Force a showdown over it. #Maass

08 Over what does your MC disagree with his/her boss or mentor? When does the boss/mentor prove to be right? #Maass

Ever been in a place you just can't seem to get away from? Today's Breakout prompt coming at ya...

09 What’s a place in your story where something significant happens? Switch two other story events to that location too.#Maass

It's characters inner lives that make fiction involving. Adding to that is not subtracting from story. Today's Breakout prompt coming up...

10 In your current scene, what’s a setting detail that delights or disgusts your POV character? Why? Elaborate & add. #Maass

Sometimes it’s the small things in life that overwhelm us with their beauty. Today’s Breakout prompt sneaking up on you…

11 Find a small passing moment in your manuscript. What big meaning does your MC see in it? Add that. #Maass

How do we know that big events are truly big? Because of the details that stick with us. Today's Breakout prompt coming up...

12 During a big dramatic event, what’s one small thing your POV character realizes will never change or never be the same again? Add. #Maass

Weekends are a good time for reflection--by your MC. Today’s Breakout prompt is coming up…

13 For your MC, what are the best things about these times? The worst? Create a passage of his/her take on this era. #Maass

The world of the story is mostly the world as your MC sees it. Today’s Breakout prompt is on the way…

14 In your climactic scene, what are 3 details of place that only your MC would notice? Cut more obvious details, replace with these.

Reversals big and small are one of the most dynamic effects in fiction. Today’s breakout prompt in a moment…

15 What’s one thing your MC hates as the story opens? By the end have your MC love that same thing. (Or vice versa.) #Maass

To provoke a noticeable change, create a sharp provocation. Today’s Breakout prompt zeroes in on your current scene…

16 What’s the precise turning point in your current scene? Make its trigger more dramatic—or less obvious. #Maass

Characters’ convictions anchor them. Pulling up those anchors is deeply dramatic. Today’s Breakout prompt is sailing your way…

17 Who in your story has an ironclad, unshakable belief? Shatter or reverse it by the story’s end. #Maass

Engaging characters are passionately engaged in life. Their feelings tell us so. Today’s Breakout prompt coming up…

18 Give your MC passionate feelings about something trivial: e.g., cappuccino, bowling, argyle socks. Write his/her rant. Add it.#Maass

It doesn't advance the story, it deepens character. @suelder How does a trivial rant advance the story?

What do you stand for? What about your MC? Today’s Breakout prompt matters…

19 What principle guides your MC? At what moment is it most tested? When does it fail? Put it into action three times. #Maass

Saturdays are good for cleaning up clutter. Here comes today’s Breakout prompt…

20 Cut 100 words from your last 3 pages.You have 5 minutes. Fail? Penalty: cut 200 words. #Maass

Dialogue is an opportunity not to be missed—an opportunity for tension. No relaxing on Sunday, guys! Today’s Breakout prompt is…

21 In the last dialogue passage you wrote double the friction, disagreement, overt hostility or hidden agenda. #Maass

Exposition, inner monologue, stream of consciousness…whatever you term it, use it to create tension. Today’s Breakout prompt is…

22 In the last inner monologue you wrote insert one insight, question or worry that hasn’t hit you (or your MC) before now. #Maass

People’s observations—especially of other people—make them interesting. Same is true of characters. Today’s Breakout prompt is…

23 What does your MC know about people that no one else does? Create 3 moments when he/she spots that in others. #Maass

In fiction, obvious emotions rarely need stating. The reader’s already felt them. Go deeper with today’s Breakout prompt…

24 Find a strong emotion and replace it with a secondary one; find a throw-away moment and infuse it with rich feelings. #Maass

Secondary characters can come and go, making little impression—a shame. Today’s Breakout prompt is about to make a grand entrance…

25 Before a new character debuts, give your MC an expectation or fear. Make the reality three times better or worse. #Maass

MC’s make mistakes but often it doesn’t cost much. Today’s Breakout prompt is designed to hurt. Here it comes…

26 Whom is your MC afraid to let down? What is the sacred trust between them? What would cause your MC to break it? Break it.#Maass

What you don’t know can’t hurt you? Heck, why *wouldn’t* you want to hurt your MC? Here comes today’s Breakout prompt…

27 What secret is your MC keeping? Who is keeping one *from* your MC? Spill the truth at the worst possible time. #Maass

Why have your characters merely talk when they can snipe, attack, burn or lay waste—verbally, I mean? Here’s today’s Breakout prompt…

28 Set off fireworks between two characters. What’s the biggest skyrocket you can explode for the finale? Go ahead…kaboom!#Maass

Down to the last three Breakout prompts! Hope you’ve found them useful. Here’s today’s…

29 What’s the emotion or experience you’re most afraid to put your MC through? Go there. Do it. Now. #Maass

Emotional research: ask others who have @DeniseBruce22 but what if you honestly haven't lived that emotion yet..don't know how to write it?

Only two Breakout prompts left! How many have you worked into your ms? Be honest. Here’s today’s…

30 What’s the worst thing that happens to your MC? Work backwards. Make it something your MC has spent a lifetime avoiding. #Maass

This is it! The final day in this month of daily Breakout prompts. Which has helped you most?

For this final Breakout prompt, an adaptation of a classic Breakout stakes raising technique. Ready? Here it comes...

31 What’s the very worst aspect of the main problem your MC faces? Find one way to make it still worse. #Maass

And some nice news for Breakout prompt users: I'll be posting weekly prompts for the rest of the year. Stay tuned. #Maass

-- April 2011 --

Ever get an eerie chill, an empty feeling inside, and know--just know--you are somewhere unsafe? Here's this week's Breakout prompt...

32 Find a corner, crossroads or dark object in your story. Invest it with eeriness, unknown portent or dread. Go there three times.#Maass

It’s Breakout Tuesday. Today’s prompt is inspired by Anne Perry, noted for the moral power of her novels. But there’s a trick to that.


Does the message in your story drop like a rock on the reader’s head? Better is to make your MC sensitive to the morality of small moments.


33 Find a small hurt someone suffers. What’s the big principle or hidden injustice it represents? Stir your MC to anger over it. #Maass

Breakout Tuesday! This week begins a series of prompts focusing on plumbing emotional depths in your WIP. Here it comes...


33 In your current scene, what’s the strongest emotion? Why is it welcome? Why not? What’s good about it? What’s utterly wrong?#Maass

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Fight the good fight!

Harry Potter + My Son = Showing vs Telling Lesson

My seven-year-old is supposed to read 15 minutes every day. This is called homework at his school. He's in second grade. We've had luke-warm success so far with this. What I mean is that he does not go and get one of the many books available to him and just read it because he wants to know what happens next. He completely sees this as a task from school -- i.e. not fun.

Last week we agreed that he will start reading  J.K. Rowling's first Harry Potter book, the Sorcerer's Stone.

This time, I took a different approach. I don't care if he reads for fifteen minutes. I care about what he understands in that span of time. Don't care about the number of pages, I care about the learning that takes place. I want to hear his interpretation of what he reads. He's a very good reader--don't get me wrong. But he's a mechanical reader.

I want him to appreciate the little details that go on in writing. I want him to appreciate the magic of words.

This is what we do: He reads a couple of paragraphs and then starts explaining it to me. I must say, it is the cutest thing. He gets a bit theatrical about the whole thing. At times I just watch him trying to explain it to me.

So I do what I hope most would. I ask him, "What do you think the author's trying to tell you?" or "Why did she say that?" or "I don't understand what he means. Can you explain it to me better? With your words?"

In that, a great lesson was learned. The lesson was not for my son, but me. What stuck out was one particular line:

Professor McGonagall pulled out a lace handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes beneath her spectacles.

I asked my son, "What's happening here?"
"She's crying," he said.
"How do you know that?" I asked.
"Because she's doing what someone who's crying would do."
"But the author didn't say cry," I argued.
"But she showed me with the thing that the professor did to her face."

BINGO. This, in a nutshell, is the age-old conversation of showing vs. telling. It's really that easy.

Ms. Rowling could have said:

Professor McGonagall cried.

Boring. We got some much more color with the actual text. She uses a "lace" handkerchief, not a cowboy bandana! She dabs, no trombone honk!

Often I wonder, "Will my reader understand what I'm trying to say? Maybe I need to be obvious."

My seven-year-old got it. Anyone can get it.

I've been fairly savage about eradicating "tell" scenes when I see them. I am sure, I still have some in ACES and in my new novel. Every time I see them, like a cockroach that won't go away, I zap it.

My story is better, my writing is better, and most importantly, the reader sees the images, depth and texture that I see.

Fight the good fight!

Bring in the Beta Readers!

Rocky Peak Academy is almost ready.

"What?" you ask.

That's my new novel. Not sure if this name will stick, but that's what I'm calling it and I'm the master of my writing destiny (for now, until an agent, and an editor, and a publicist, and a... you get the picture).

I'm just about done editing my first draft. I suppose that would be considered the 2nd draft, but I'm not ready to make that commitment yet.

My manuscript will go to my wife (first reader) and Michael Levin (coach, BS detector and best selling novelist extraordinaire) sometime next week.

Once I have their feedback (the good, the bad, and a bunch of ugly), I will start the 2nd draft in earnest. And once that's done... bring in the beta readers.

Here's how I choose mine: they need to really care about my writing goals, they need to be willing and able to tell me the blatant truth, some will be artistically inclined, some are nearly copy editors, some are aspiring novelists. In total, I try to get about six of them. But it needs to be an even number.

Why even? For the tie-breaker, of course!

I will take all of their feedback and consider everything carefully (my ego is very small... it really is. I accept most feedback on face-value). If there's a pattern, then I have to trust my beta readers. But if there's a split, then house wins (that's me). I will make the call.

How do you pick your beta-readerss?

Do you look for people with strong fashion sense?

Maybe physically attractive?

Or is the intellectuals?

How many people?

Nope... no steroids here

Let me know. I'm very needy.

Take care, write well, and always, fight the good fight.

Like Fine Wine...

Today, I completed the read-through of my new novel. I'm very proud at this moment. It may be the effect of the special energy concoction I twitted about...

I needed a boost and this one did it. I was able to complete the non-editing read-through of my first draft. I found some holes, some gaps, and some not so impressive areas. But that's what the 2nd draft is for, right?

All in all, I am very happy. I got goosebumps at the end of the story. That has to be good, particularly since I knew how it ended :)

When I finished my first draft, I set aside my manuscript for two weeks. I was very good about it. Not once did I read it. I was tempted. Big time. Here's another one of my paranoid tweets:

I waited two weeks. My hero, Stephen King, in his book on the craft of writing (On Writing) recommends a minimum of two weeks, ideally a month.

My other hero, James Scott Bell, also recommends the same thing in his fantastic books.

So I did, and it was the best thing I could have done. The time created distance and objectivity. In fact I had forgotten a lot of the details. Even the name of the bad guy had escaped me. I was able to read it like a "near" first time reader.

On my first novel, ACES, the two weeks was painful. With this one, I was able to handle it. During the two weeks I read books that I need to read, worked on my blog, got sick, and worked on strategy documents for my day job. And because I worked on other things, I was able to get a lot more value from the process.

Tell me, what's your process between your first draft and when you read the entire manuscript again?

How long do you wait?
What do you do to fill that space?